Fade
by everfire
Summary: Roxas is regaining the memories he lost. The problem is now it's too late. He's inside Sora, and Axel is... so it's too late, right?
1. The way things are

A/N: why is it always Namine? huh muse? Anyway, more Akuroku! Just hold out for it! Short chapters bring fast updates!

Chapter one: The way things are

"Do you really have everything you want?  
You can't ever give somethin' you ain't got  
You can't run away from yourself"

"Are you happy now" by Michelle Branch

* * *

Namine had listened quietly, her eyebrows creased. She had resisted the urge to nod solemnly, knowing that it wouldn't help the situation at hand. He was talking and yet telling her nothing. Then again nothing ever changed anyway.

Roxas had smiled then, trying to reassure her. It wasn't often that they got to meet like this, and he was putting on his best face.

Her eyes scanned the not-ocean disinterestedly. The dreamscape was more convoluted than usual. The edges were fraying like paper after working it under an eraser for rather too long, and the colors seemed indistinct. It took both of their minds in order to see anything at all, and even then it was not quite reality. They simply couldn't remember all the details of life. They hadn't ever really lived anyway, she supposed.

In the dreams, there had never been any warm or cold. She wondered whether the sensation was something she had ever felt herself, or if she was borrowing the memories from Kairi. Either way made sense. Still she longed to feel something, maybe harshness of sand or coolness of water. She couldn't have the warmth of his skin, because he didn't have any.

Namine glanced back at her fellow dreamer and asked what she had been wanting to, "Are you happy now, Roxas?"

His eyes blinked in surprise. "What do you mean? Of course!" She wondered if eventually he would blend into the background. She wondered if she had already; if he saw her at all.

"Are you really?" The sky disappeared. It might not have been there to start with. She couldn't remember.

Roxas smiled and it was the heart he didn't have. That smile was Sora, innocent and brave. "We saved the worlds and now everything can go back to how it was supposed to be." His smile was sick and she hated it.

"You're lying." Namine felt her own voice bleed into Kairi's, and she flinched. "Roxas," She called, a little louder then was necessary, needing to hear _her _voice, "you're memories are coming back, aren't they?"

His blue eyes widened. They _had_ been blue. Ashamed, he turned his face away from her. "Just impressions," he admitted.

Namine leaned forward. The sound of the waves crashing rushed to reach her ears. It wasn't until then that she realized it had been silent. "Why didn't you tell me?" Her fingers itched to hold a pen. Everything was starting to look like a canvas.

"I… didn't think they would ever come back." The world blended becoming a watercolor painting that had water thrown on it.

* * *

"Roxas!" Kairi screamed with Namine's voice, as the contact broke. The dream splintered into shards and vanished. She sat up in bed soaked with sweat, and breathing heavily. "I'm sorry." Kairi said out loud to her other self. She glanced down at her trembling hands. It was getting harder to hold the connection, and taking more energy than it had at first.

When they had first tried to let their nobodies speak, it had been effortless. She shook her head languidly. 'I'm exhausted.' Muscles in her hands twitched when she tried to move them. 'I don't know if I can handle doing this too much more…'

She tried to reach inside herself, "Namine?" There wasn't any answer, but she supposed that her other self must be tired as well. She let her body ease down to the bed, eyes closing as she fell. "Goodnight."

* * *

In another house, Sora woke up, tears running unbidden down his face. He couldn't remember why.

* * *


	2. Smile

A/N: It should be mentioned that the songs used here were chosen for their lyrics and the similarity to the story and not for any real love of the song itself. In this chapter, some AKUROKU!!!! Next chapter should be up quicker than this one...

Chapter 2: Smile

"Together in all these memories,  
I see your smile."

"Memories" by Within Temptation.

"You're name is Roxas." A shadow explained calmly.

…_Organization Thirteen…_

"Hi! I'm Axel."

…_sunset… It's just like that time…_

"I'll be showing you the ropes from now on." Axel grinned, wide and toothy. "Got it memorized?"

…_partner…_

It was strange that Axel's hands were warm. Normally the nobodies wore gloves, under the pretence that they always had. It made them seem more like a single entity, rather than individuals. Like the coat, it transformed them into the organization. They were bigger than themselves. It was clinical; thoughtless. It had the unconscious side effect of removing the warmth of human touch.

Somehow warmth got mixed up in what it meant to be somebody in Roxas' unconsciousness. Only somebodies who could love, hurt, and FEEL, really feel, could be warm. That was why he was so shocked.

Axel had reached out with his gloved hand that encompassed his rather than held it. His mentor had looked at him transfixed. Green eyes flashed even if there wasn't a light source to gleam off his catlike eyes. Then he had removed his hand from Roxas' long enough to pull the leather bindings off by the fingertip. The red head hadn't smiled like normal, just looked reverent. He had seemed about to cry.

Roxas caught his breath when Axel pulled off his gloves to revel the blonde's petite fingers. Axel was very careful not to give any contact skin on skin as he lifted the dark cloth away. Roxas didn't breathe until the last resistance gave and in a rush the covering was gone. The mentor had licked his lips playfully and shifted closer to the younger member. A puff of air kissed Roxas' cheek during the adjustment. Despite there no longer being any necessity for it, the blonde's hands remained suspended. He was waiting for something…for anything!

Gently, Axel touched Roxas, fingertip to fingertip. They moved together, fingers sliding into each fingers like tectonic plates, creating little mountains out of knuckles and joints. Green eyes narrowed marginally with mirth.

"I think I just died a little."

…_see you, partner…_

…_let's meet in the next life…_

…_you have a heart, don't you? But…we don't really have hearts…_

…_silly, just because you have a 'next life'…_

…_maybe you're going to sleep… _

…_going to sleep…_

…_sleep…_

…_you're…fading away…_

* * *

"What have I done?" The question wove itself into a litany of similar questions that all wrapped around her heart. "How can I explain it to him?" Namine drifted her hands over the sketchbook that she had concocted for herself with the help of Kairi. She still needed the help of some other mind to create something as small as this.

"What's going on, Namine?" Kairi asked herself in confusion. Normally she was just somehow dimly aware of what Namine was thinking. This was the first time she could say that she was confused by what Namine was alluding to. 'Unless…' Kairi thought before asking shakily, "Namine?"

The blonde girl looked up at her other half and smiled. "This isn't something I can talk to you about yet." She reached out and took Kairi's hand, "goodbye for now." Kairi's vision blurred and went dark.

"Namine!" Kairi yelled into her empty bedroom. Sunrise was just starting to peak from behind her curtains. She touched her chest trying to locate the other girl, "Namine?" she whispered. No one answered.

* * *


	3. Kairi's fading light

Chapter 3: Kairi's fading light

"You always light my way  
I hope there never comes a day  
No matter where I go  
I always feel you so  
'Cause you're everywhere to me"

"Everywhere" by Michelle Branch

* * *

When it came to dealing with the nobody there weren't many people that Kairi could go to for help. Most people just weren't aware of their existence, and those that were resided on different worlds. Short of a catastrophic event there was no way of ever reaching them again. Thanks to Sora.

_Sora…_

Perhaps the only person who could ever understand her situation with Namine was Sora. Sora was the only person who even had a inkling of what a nobody was, aside from Riku. Sora was more inclined to understand this problem because he had Roxas, another self, just like she had Namine. The only problem was that Sora was unlikely to know any more than she did. Still, she had to try. It was possible that he had learned something more about the nature of their other self's in his travels than she had in hers. In fact it was more likely. The journey had changed Sora in a different way than it had educated Kairi and Riku. Sora was special. Sora was...

_Sora… _

She thoughtfully tapped her pencil onto her notebook. The lead broke on a particular tap. 'When we were younger it was no problem talking to Sora, it was easy.' She idly sketched a picture of the brown haired boy. 'what changed? was it me? or Sora? or the whole world around us?'

"Psst, Kairi," Kairi looked up to see her classmate bent over her desk and peering at the drawing curiously. Seeming to get distracted, Selphie made a sound of astonishment. "Nice work! It's Sora, isn't it?" She pointed at the hair in the drawing, "No accounting for taste when it comes to that boy, huh?" She indicated what she thought of his clothing choices with a rude gesture that somehow managed to appear cute when she did it.

Kairi forced calm into her voice and managed to giggle a bit. "Oh? What about Wakka? He has so much more taste?" She teased the other girl, poking her in the chest from her seated posistion.

"Well, I wouldn't need to go shopping with him if certain girlfriends of mine would come along every once and a while." Selphie teased back straightening her back and putting her hands on her hips.

Kairi let herself be swept away in the familiar conflict she and her friend had. Selphie was a comforting constant in Kairi's life, if a nagging one.

Suddenly breaking the tone of the conversation, the brunette asked, "Is Sora in trouble again, Kairi?"

The pink-haired girl took a sharp breath, "I don't know." She shook her head, she didn't want to lie to Selphie, but she couldn't tell her what was going on. "I think I need to talk to him."

"Oh? Well, now's your chance it's been lunchtime for a few minutes now." She smiled proud that she had monopolized her friend for so long.

Kairi looked around the empty classroom, "Selphie?! Why didn't you tell me sooner?" Her eyes were wide with confusion and betrayal.

"You might be worse than Sora if you need to be reminded of something like that!" Selphie said, chuckling.

Kairi stood up and took off running; she wouldn't have much time to locate the older boy before lunch was over. She didn't even take the time to say goodbye to her other friend. She found him outside the back doors of the science wing. He was carrying a paper bag, presumably his lunch, and looking around in quick nervous head motions.

"Sora!" Kairi called out waving her hand over her head.

Sora stopped looking around at her call and walked up towards her, "Hey, Kairi." He offered in welcome, and she opened her mouth to say something when he continued, "Have you seen Riku? He promised to meet me around here, but I can't seem to find him."

She resisted the urge to close her eyes. Kairi remembered now why Sora was so unreachable. "Look, Sora, I haven't seen Riku, but I have something important I want to ask you about…"

"Oh there he is!" Sora exclaimed, pointing in the direction of the silver haired boy. Riku had just exited the literary wing that ran parallel to the science wing. He was flanked by several younger girls, all of whom were holding far more lunch then their skinny frames would suggest they consumed regularly. Sora grimaced at the unexpected company. Turnign away decidely from his friend, he offered, "Did you say something, Kairi?"

"Sora," Kairi started, taking a deep breath, "Have you noticed anything wrong with Roxas? Or have you been more tired lately…?" She trailed off when she noticed a set of deeply confused eyes gazing at her.

Cocking his head, he responded, "What are you talking about? I'm fine…" The brown haired boy glanced back to see that Riku had somehow convinced the girls to find someone else to share their noon meal with, and was now walking towards his childhood friends.

Unable to continue the conversation, Kairi only stared as he waved a goodbye and told her he would see her later. 'What is going on?' she thought to herself, as she watched his retreating back. She felt an odd sense of déjà vu, and wondered how long he had been running away from her.

* * *

A/N: Firstly, sorry this took so long to update. Secondly, this chapter the longest so far had no Roxas? none at all? o.O Look forward to the next one!!!

Also to thoses who have asked, This fic will be multi chaptered, in fact there will be exactly 13 chapters. Good enough to satisfy you for now?

NEW NOTE: this chapter was updated for correctness and clarity. I hope that the changes help my readers to understand exactly what is happening.


	4. memories

A/N: sorry it took so long!

Chapter 4: Memories

"Until the last resilient hope  
Is frozen deep inside my bones  
And this broken fate has claimed me  
And my memories for its own  
Your name is pounding through my veins  
Can't you hear how it is sung?  
And I can taste you in my mouth  
Before the words escape my lungs  
And I'll whisper only once..."

"The secret's in the Telling" by Dashboard Confessional

Sometimes Roxas would sit on the edge of the castle and wonder what the darkness really was. He could see it, swirling like perverse clouds just at the edge of the nothingness. Sometimes he wondered if the darkness was in the building he sat on too. He would wonder if the darkness was in him. Then Axel would come.

The red head would smile softly and stare out in the direction of the dark, looking past it at something else. Neither of them moved or acknowledged the other's presence. The silence was enough.

'Please, touch me' Roxas always thought, and he'd shift his weight.

Axel would sigh, as he leaned forward setting a hand under his chin. The other hand, closer to Roxas would slip onto the castle's stone.

Then Roxas would smile, bigger than usual, and slip his hand down on top of Axel's hand. 'Meet me later?' Roxas would think so loudly that surely he must hear.

Those green eyes would soften.

Tonight Roxas sat amongst those memories. He shifted his weight on the stones that he had dreamed. It was only a habit, one that his body had long forgotten. A habit he had forgotten had ever been formed. He sighed his imagined air and cried his imagined tears. "Axel," he whispered.

_…Lips on lips…_

Roxas blinked a few more tears breaking loose. His eyes then widened . _Had Axel and him really….?_

…Red spiky hair was between Roxas' fingers. Green eyes looked at him full of amusement as Roxas nipped their owner's collar bone.

"All this just because you can't sleep?" Axel joked poking the shorter boy in the chest.

Roxas blushed bright pink "Shut up!"

"Make me, key of destiny." The bow of his lips curved maliciously.

With a glare, Roxas dipped his head and…

Roxas could suddenly remember what Axel tasted like, very vividly. He Blushed deeply and shut his eyes willing himself not to share that tidbit with Sora.

XXXX

"What?" Sora suddenly screamed into Riku's very surprised face. "But…" 'I haven't even kissed Riku.' Sora thought. The idea that he, or rather not him, but his body, which wasn't his body at the time, had done something distinctly sexual had invaded his mind. It was even more disturbing that he was very certain that it wasn't Riku, or Kairi that 'he' had done it to. 'Who?' he asked, and he wasn't sure what he was asking.

XXXX

'Axel'

With striking clarity he understood who Axel was. He was fire, wild and warm. He was a hand to hold when the darkness was too much. He was someone who understood his insanity and listened to his fears and wishes like they were sacred. He was his best friend. Axel was his, truly his, as no one else had been. In a way that no one had been since. He belonged to Roxas and Roxas belonged to him, completely. They were made complete by their connection.

'He made me feel like I had a heart…'

Axel had been what made him real, and in turn he had made Axel real. Axel was heated breath and whispered words. He was a secret that left marks on his skin beneath his clothing. He was a wordless curse between parted lips. Axel was…

Axel was gone…

He had never told him…never explained…and now he was gone.

Roxas was alone, unable to exist without Axel, and unable to stop existing. The separation was suddenly painful, and the memories cruel. He could feel his lover's hands on his chest and see his eyes. All he had was dreams of reality so it was as every bit as real as every other sensation he had. All that was left to keep him sane was the memories. Those same memories were driving him mad.


	5. Hallelujah

A/N: Word count exceed, but you'll forgive me.

* * *

Chapter 5: Hallelujah

"Remember when I moved in you;

the holy dark was moving too,

and every breath we drew was

Hallelujah"

Hallelujah by Rufus Wainwright

It hadn't been love. It couldn't have been. Axel had never called it love, and he had never thought of it as love. Love was an emotion, and as a nobody he couldn't feel emotions. Love was something that they would never understand, at least not until they had hearts.

Roxas shook his head. They had never gotten hearts, had they? What had been so wrong with wanting to feel? Did they deserve to be punished for wanting to be a real person? Did they really have to die?

Could a nobody even really be said to die anyway?

…Are you sure you don't have a heart, Roxas?...

So it hadn't been love, but it was something. It had meant something. Touching Axel had been like a word he couldn't pronounce. They had shared in those stolen moments an understanding, that a second later could no longer be described. Axel had made Roxas come undone.

…footsteps echoed just outside Roxas' room. The room's occupant opened his eyes and stared fixedly at the doorway. His room was lit like the rest of the castle seemingly by a light all its own that never dimmed or faded. Roxas could clearly see his nighttime visitor, flame red hair falling into his eyes, and giving him away despite the hood pulled over his head.

"Axel?" Roxas called groggily, sitting up. He never took off his cloak, and his bed had no comfort like a blanket to cover him. Such things were unnecessary and only made people more likely to sleep longer than strictly needed. Or so Saix said.

Axel laughed, and lowered the black cloth away from his face. He entered and shut the door behind him. "Hey." Axel offered as greeting.

"What are you…doing here?"

Axel scratched the back of his head and grinned. "…that one is gone. I figured you might not be able to rest. You're the kind of person to think about it too much and waste valuable sleeping time."

The blond boy smiled, "I guess you're right."

"It looks like I was wrong though." Axel walked farther into the room, glancing around at the barren walls. "Sorry for waking you up."

Roxas quickly crawled to the edge of the bed, "You don't have to go anywhere do you?"

Axel raised a brow, "Where would I have to go in the middle of the night?"

"Then," the younger nobody scrambled into a position where his legs hung loose over the edge of the bed, "you can stay?"

With his head cocked to the side and a catlike grin Axel replied, "If you want me to…"

"Why would I ask if I didn't?"

"Why would I come if I couldn't?"

Roxas grunted softly, and averted his eyes from his best friend. A weight landed on the bed beside him. Axel had joined him. It was the first time that anyone had sat on the bed other than Roxas himself, but somehow it didn't seem strange. Even when the red head leaned back, his hands netted behind his head, and he just relaxed into the space that had always belonged to only Roxas. The thought crossed his mind that it couldn't bother him, as he couldn't feel bothered.

"Hey, Axel," The blond spoke all at once, excitement tingeing his words, "do you want to go get ice cream?"

Axel chuckled, "Now? It's closed already." The red head rolled onto his side and rested on a single bent elbow. He bumped the shorter boy with his other hand playfully.

"Oh." Roxas lowered his eyes with true anguish.

"Hey, don't get like that; we can still do other things." Axel gestured with his free gloved hand.

"Oh?" Roxas cocked his head, "like what?"

"uh, you know, stuff."

"That means you have no idea."

"Shut up!" They sat in companionable silence fort a few moments, just breathing.

It was Roxas who spoke up first, "Axel, what's it like to kiss someone?"

With a start, Axel sat up, "Why that question all of a sudden?"

"I saw…" He looked away, not willing to divulge that private scene that he had intruded on, "I just want to know…and who else am I supposed to ask?"

Axel blinked, and then smiled mischievously.

"What are you?!" the shorter boy started, unnerved by his friend's gaze. He swiveled his body to look at the fiery youth better and in doing so put some distance between them.

Then Axel kissed him. He had to shift his whole body, but he did so smoothly like a snake uncoiling. In all one motion his lips were pressed gently against his best friend's. Axel's hands were pressed down into the sheet in order to hold him up, and his eyes were shut softly. Meanwhile Roxas was frozen in place. He could hear blood rushing past his ears and pounding into his brain, which was trying so hard to process this shift. His eyes were wide open and near enough to Axel's to count eyelashes. Before he even had a chance to remember to breathe, Axel had pulled away.

"So? How was it?" Axel had moved back to a respectable distance and now sat in the same position as Roxas, legs over the edge of the bed, but turned to face each other. His lips were still curved at the edges.

"Wha? Axel!" Roxas recovered slowly, a flush tinting his face and the tips of his ears. "Don't tease me like that! I shouldn't have asked you." He felt warm to the point of unpleasant.

"Why not?" Green eyes stared directly through Roxas, all signs of mirth gone. A subtle veil of confusion settled in its wake.

Roxas exhaled a puff of air haughtily, "It's different for us than it would be."

"A kiss still feels the same." Axel touched his lips thoughtfully. He shifted closer to Roxas, placing his hands back to the bed. "For us we wouldn't know the difference, right? All I have in the memories of what it was. We have the ideas, but not the emotion. "

"Yeah, I guess." Roxas could sense that something Axel was telling him was a lie.

Axel lifted a hand to poke the shorter boy, "So?"

"I felt…" Roxas searched for a word that would explain it, "hot."

"Oh?" Axel 's eyes widened, but he sounded pleased.

"Yeah." The longer he was talking the more he remembered that sensation of warmth creeping into his cheeks.

The smile was completely back to full force on the red head's face when he said, "You're blushing."

"I…I am?" Roxas touched his face experimentally.

"That means you liked it." Axel explained sagely.

Roxas considered. There was a...positive sensation before the uncomfortable heat. He nodded.

Axel licked his lips, and realized that he needed to catch his breath. This was exciting; he felt like he was in a fight, ready to dance amidst the flames.

This time Roxas closed the distance. His motion was clumsier than Axel's had been. He climbed up onto his hands and knees and then crawled close instead of leaning his neck out. When Roxas was inches away he closed his eyes and then pressed their lips together.

Axel felt them crash and noted with pleasure that the other boy's lips were completely relaxed. The temperature of Roxas' skin could be felt coming off in waves as soon as he had closed his eyes. Axel turned his head never loosing contact, instead brushing his lips over the other's.

The sensation of each movement that Axel made sent sparks through the places he touched. _'More…' _Roxas acted impulsively and grasped a hold on his partner. His fingers slid into Axel's hair easily. Although it was stiff with something unnatural, with enough pressure it yielded to his seeking fingers. Abruptly and full of intensity, Roxas pushed Axel's hands aside and crawled into the taller boy's lap. They only parted for seconds, but it was long enough for Roxas to hear a pitiful mewling sound emit from between his own parted lips.

Roxas stood glareing at the flickering image of his own memory not sure it it was real or dream. He could taste him, touch him, he was right there in front of him, and yet... how was that different from any experience he had now? So in a twisted way it was real. His entire personailty was built on an uncertain set of memories. These memories couln't be coming to like like this. There was no way that Roxas could continue this way.

He knew what to do.

_Namine...._


	6. Namine's Grace

Chapter 6: Namine's Grace

"I'm giving up on doing this alone now  
Cause I've failed and I'm ready to be shown how  
He's told me the way and I'm trying to get there  
And this life sentence that I'm serving  
I admit that I'm every bit deserving  
But the beauty of grace is that it makes life not fair"

-Be my escape by Relient K

It was painful, unspeakable hours before Roxas could speak with Namine. It wasn't enough to want to speak with her he needed contact. Either both Kairi and Sora needed to be asleep, or touching. In the recesses of Sora's mind, that Roxas had confined himself to, it was impossible to tell time. He was trapped with no way to avoid the memories, until those hours slowly inched past. Every second felt like eternity.

He was poised to take his chance as soon as the opportunity presented itself. So, with a pleased sound he slipped like water into Namine's sanctum. Today it bared a frightening resemblance to that white room she had resided in before. When he stumbled in, she didn't look up from her pad of paper.

"Roxas," She whispered, but when her eyes fell on him she made a tiny gasp. "Are you alright?" She stood up.

"Why is this happening to me now?" He asked seemingly to himself, as he sat in a chair as white and unfocused as the surrounding space. "I," He shook his head and got his bearings, turning beautiful eyes on the girl, "Namine...I need your help. I can't take these visions any longer."

"Roxas," Namine stood from her chair and stepped forward as if to touch him, but stopped short, her eyes troubled, "You know I'd do anything to help you."

"Good, because I'm going to need all the help I can get." He wondered vaguely how she saw him, or if she saw him at all. There was a long moment then when Namine tried to understand what he was asking of her, and Roxas tried desperately to think of the words that would convince her to aid him.

"Roxas, you can tell me anything…" The young girl placed a transparent hand on her friend's. "What's going on? What do you need from me?"

Before speaking a pink lip disappeared into Roxas' mouth, "I'm being haunted with the past. Those days so long ago….those memories that I was only ever told I didn't have, I didn't know they could come back. I didn't even want to believe what Axel said, that I had lost something. Now I see though, I lost everything! I couldn't even enjoy it while it was happening! At least not the way I can now, with sora's skin going hot at the mere thought…."

Namine blushed, not sure what he was talking about, but he seemed distressed and she knew she had to help him. She clutched his hand and smiled kindly. "Shh, it's alright. We can work through your memories…"

"NO!" The boy said and color filled his cheeks, "I mean, no," Roxas amended looking ashamed for having shouted. "What I want is freedom from these memories. If you do that then Sora and I have a chance for a regular life."

Eyes like the sea blinked liquidly, "You want me to take away your memories?" She lifted her hands away from his to cover a shocked mouth.

"I can't think of any other way to rid me of the pain," The keyblade wielder pleaded.

"Without your memories, you'll cease to exist." Namine whispered, "All that makes us who we are is our memories." She sighed and lifted a hand outward, distressed at how little of an image Roxas could project into her mind considering the topic. "I'll never see you again" She added softly.

The boy walked into her embrace only dispersing like smoke a little on the edges. "You could be free too."

She shook her head, "no, this is only a thing I can do for you. I'm not exactly…just a part of Kairi."

"I see." There was a note of remorse in those few words.

Namine pretended to breathe and deeply wished she could remember what he smelled like. "I…there must be a better option."

The boy exhaled into the shell of her ear. "I'm open to suggestions."

Then the girl pulled back with a strange look on her face that left Roxas wondering if she just forgot how to make the expression she wanted. "What about a second chance?"


	7. Atonement

Fade chapter 7: Atonement

"I promise you, I'd go everywhere I've been  
To find a way to make atonement for my sin and see  
See your smiling face again"

Nothing I won't give- Vic Mignogna

It hadn't taken long to explain the concept to Roxas. A new chance was something that he hadn't even dared to let himself believe could happen. When her words sank in, there was a palpable relaxing energy surrounding them both. "It shouldn't take too long." Namine assured.

"Will it hurt?" Roxas asked, lips rolling into his mouth expectantly while he waited for her response.

Namine cocked her head to the side. "what a strange question." She then shook her head negatively, "I don't think so, but I can't really remember, and neither will you in a few moments."

"Oh," Roxas looked down. "so I guess it doesn't matter then, huh?"

Once again Namine shook her head, even though she felt like she was lying. "Do you need to think about it?"

"No," the pale boy replied "I'm ready as soon as you can take this all away."

The next thing Roxas would know would be darkness. Once again, he was surrounded in the space between memories.

The blond boy dissipated as Namine began her work. She reached into her own dim memories. If she relaxed she could still feel the traces of each and every world that she once had been connected to. She would create something from each little thread, much like the copy of twilight town. This place would be unique, something like them, so Roxas would feel safe and welcomed. It would also have memories of people that no longer were, or those who never had been. Those memories would live again in a dream; a dream that Namine dreamed for Roxas.

She thought deeply about breathing, but couldn't talk herself into pretending the action. The room shifted away. Her paper faded into the darkness behind closed eyelids. Namine herself became nothing but a flicker in the REM of Kairi's thoughts. Whispers of the past blurred together in a colorful present. The figment of reality that the girl in the white dress had tried so hard to cling to was smeared like a watercolor picture soaked in tears.

Bitterly Namine began to chip away at the thoughts that held Roxas to Axel. She took his deepest, most secret memories and produced a copy. He would be the Axel who had called Roxas best friend. He would also be the Axel as remembered by a girl in a white room: a man whose kind words were both surprising and soothing. She dug deeper into the mind she inhabited and procured a man who would drag young girl away from her home for a dark purpose. Lastly, she pulled the memories from the oblivious Sora of a man who whispered about a heart he didn't have as he destroyed himself for the good of all.

It was like ripping into open wounds. She knew the facts, but to have to feel them so plainly was torturous. Once again experiencing the loss of Roxas. Once again she turned her back on reality and pushed the limits of her power. This time though it was so he could LIVE. She owed it to the boy she had so many times trapped in his own thoughts.

"I wanted to meet you...just once."

"Roxas." She whispered even though he wasn't there anymore, and neither was she. "Your name is Roxas."

XXXXXXXX

Slowly feeling was coming back to Roxas, starting at his chest and throat. It burned hot and cold all at once as his body struggled to breathe. His body was slowly being reconstructed. His eyes would be made of the sky, and his skin would be drawing paper, his hair would be the sands of destiny island, and twilight town would be clothing. He was reborn in a new world.

Blue eyes blinked open to diffused sunlight. "What a weird dream." The young boy commented to himself as he sat up in his bed, the starry comforter falling away.

A dull banging resounded from an oak door that was the only entry to this room. "Roxas!" came a girls voice. He remembered her.

"Yeah, yeah, Namine. I'm awake." he stood up and opened the window, ready to breathe in some fresh air.


End file.
